You’ll never hear me cry in the dark
When the lamps flicker out
And the sky is all but empty
When the city is only lit
With grey clouds of dust and ash
And the shadow of the fire that started it all
You’ll never see my heart
When I let my guard down
Only ever truly beautiful
When it breaks into a thousand pieces
You’ll never hear me weep
For the love I have felt and forgotten
For the grief I will never be able to put into words
For all the apologies that I should have said before
For all the words that killed me to say
And for all the words that killed me to keep in
You may never know the side of me
That I know you wish existed
But I always kept it hidden from you
And I probably always will
Because I couldn’t stand the idea
Of someone else knowing me better
Than I know myself
You may never know the part of me
That creates my art
And chases my dreams
Because I don’t have the strength to do that on my own
But someday
If you know me well enough by then
You may see a glimpse
Of the side of me
That makes and breaks my promises
The side of me that wants to say sorry
But never will
But you’ll never hear me cry in the dark
Because my misery has no present, past, or future
And there is no moving on,
There is no moving forward
There is nothing but a single path
Leading me back and forth through time itself
And slowly but surely
Bringing me to you
-Ashni Singh